Carrying Cullen

A Journey of Life, Love, and Daily Blessings with Our Baby Boy

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Ainsley Grace and Amazing Grace

It was a day we anxiously waited for, hoped for and prayed for.  On July 12th, 2016, at 9:40 a.m., our beautiful daughter, Ainsley Grace, was joyfully welcomed into this world.  8 lbs 6 oz. 20 1/4 inches long.  Cullen's baby sister, our precious rainbow baby, was whole, healthy, and absolutely perfect.  Our hearts burst with love and appreciation to our Lord and Savior for blessing us with this amazing little life.  To Him all the honor and glory for creating such a precious baby girl and blessing us with another child.  



From the very moment we learned we were pregnant with Ainsley Grace, we were abundantly blessed with God's amazing grace.  Just as He walked us through our journey with Cullen, He was with us every step of this pregnancy.  We were incredibly thankful we were able to return to Maternal Fetal Medicine at Harrisburg Hospital for our prenatal care.  One of only a few prenatal patients, we felt comforted to see familiar faces and know those tending to me and our baby girl.  Every doctor visit we went to, we held our breath until the ultrasound... waiting to hear the words, "everything looks good" or "everything is perfectly normal" or "she's perfectly average, keep doing what you're doing".  And every time we heard those words, saying a prayer of thanks.

Not only were we able to return to the same practice, but Dr. Tressler offered to deliver Ainsley, as well.  For those of you who may not know, Dr. Tressler is actually no longer performing hospital deliveries or c-sections and is essentially just doing office care and visits.  So needless to say, we knew God was moving in big ways by having him in the OR to deliver Ainsley.  Not to mention the countless nurses and individuals that made it a point to be there with us on Ainsley's birthday, who had also been there with us on Cullen's birthday.  Our amazing prep and recovery nurse, Shawnee, my anesthesiologist, Dr. Joe, our special angel nurse, Liz, and so many others!  We were extremely thankful for the fellows at the practice who provided amazing care and all of the others who were present, helping provide a safe and healthy delivery.  


It seemed like an eternity until I got to see her sweet face and hold her in my arms (mostly because under the circumstances with Cullen, they gave him to me as quickly as possible), but the (in reality) short wait was worth it. She was the most beautiful baby girl I'd ever seen and my heart instantly melted.  I think any parent would agree with me, that the first moment of seeing your baby is completely indescribable.  How do you describe the best feeling in the world?  An overwhelming amount of emotions came over me.  So much love, so much joy; pure gratefulness for her arriving safely and healthy into our arms, and yet an ache was still there missing our sweet boy. While I wouldn't change things, part of me wished Cullen was here to meet his baby sister.  But I know that he was watching over her the day she was born and she will have the most precious angel watching over her always.  Ainsley actually has a little spot on her head that looks like a bald spot but is just a spot that grows blonde while the rest grows darker...  We say it's a "kiss from Heaven" from her big brother.  Looking at it that way to me, is a reminder that he will always be with us and that he loves his baby sister.

Now, on to enjoying every day we're given with this precious life.  The joys, moments and milestones we will never be able to share with Cullen because that wasn't part of God's plan.  Looking forward to each and every one of them with this little girl.  Thank you to all of you who have prayed for us and for Ainsley.  God listens and answers prayers.  He certainly did with this sweet bundle of joy.  

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